August 9, 2013

Daybreak after illness. One is very tentative, holding on to signs that it is gone, testing one’s strength, wondering, “do I go to the gym today for a very light one?”. An odd pain low down on my abdomen started with the fever, and so I thought it was related, but it lingers (worsens) and the phrase “kidney stone” crosses my mind. That wouldn’t be fair: I’m the most hydrated person in the world. It is completely and eerily silent at this hour. The tapping of the keys is the loudest thing in the world. Fever opens the mind to thoughts one normally compartmentalizes. I’ll spend at least the morning sorting those out, choosing the ones to consider and the one to slip back in the files.

The wheel is very large, but one cannot quite get off it.