July 20, 2021

Y first thing in the morning. Everyone there, and at Starbuck’s afterwards, unusually friendly and open. 

Bears broke the sunflowers in planters on the porch. You can see the chewed heads of the flowers strewn across the grass. You’d think they would have profited more by letting the seeds develop and eating them then. 

Vestry meeting last night. Smooth sailing, except there’s too much to be done and I don’t know how to do most of it; except for some people are “still hurting” from an incident happening two years ago and explained into atoms since. N and M left us  because they had more attractive offers elsewhere and not because of some hierarchical or misogynist cabal working in the shadows, yet some long so for that cabal that they need to bring the issue up long after the issue’s death, with the one excuse they know good Christian people will not reject out of hand: “I’m hurting!” Republicans are hurting–genuinely, I suppose–over the results of the last election, but that doesn’t mean they deserve further explanation or accommodation. I want to say, “If you’re hurt here, go somewhere else,” but I’m not sure that is say-able under the church’s roof. Though, the church has always had a way to deal with the stirrers-up-of-strife. Dante put them in hell. One of my gifts is to be able to tell fairly accurately the difference between a reasonable perspective and an emotional one. Surprising how often that kind of discernment is not welcome. People worry that we won’t be able to call a new Dean until we have our internal conflicts settled, but the nature of those conflicts is almost too petty to acknowledge: not doctrine, not principle, not finances, but the hurt that comes from not being paid the attention which we think we deserve: babies fighting over papa’s lap.