Then tropical storm Irma drove through, switching the power off and on through the night, littering the yard with trees and branches, but leaving me materially unharmed. Trees fell across streets in the night, meaning one had to detour and pick one’s way to one’s destination. Surprised how at sea I am without my cable. Even after a night of storm I assume that the outage afflicts only me, and that if I thought hard enough I could figure how to fix it on my own.
Contemplating deeply and sadly in the trances of the storm. I know the shape of my life, and that it has not changed from the earliest time I was moved to take stock. No effort of will or work or study or faith or patience of fury budged it. It adds credibility to those who argue for fate and pre-determination. Tried to dismay God by saying, truthfully, “I would rather not have bothered.” I’m sure He’s heard that before.
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